May 2008
81 posts
While walking to Lenny's for breakfast, we notice...
Ben: They did a crappy job blocking off the streets, look at all the people walking through.
Me: I just heard that girl say John Travolta and Denzel Washington are in this film.
Ben: Denzel is way cooler than Travolta.
Me: Do you think they can see us sitting here eating?
Ben: I don't know, why?
Me: I don't have a bra on.
Ben: I can't believe you just said that.
Me: Look at how many people are involved in a scene like this.
Ben: I know, do they really need to carry around all that crap?
Me: Yeah they do.
Ben: I feel like an iphone could do half of that.
The Road Robert Frost Wouldn't Suggest, But What...
At 16 all I was concerned with were sports, my hot driver’s licence pic (I wore a crop top and Dickies overalls), and math. At 18 I was enrolled in the School of Engineering at the University of Michigan. During orientation I wore my matching U of A sweatsuit, donned brand new Nike Air 95s, and snarled at my astute peers. As I was oriented the Dean reassured everyone that U of M was right in...
Caught Red Handed! →
I will not be duped. I will not go to lookout point with you. I know better.
I'm a victim. →
I smelled Nigerian King the whole time…but continued to email back and forth with the Greecian.
Going to a book reading of “Have I Got A Guy For You” tonight.
They should have pulled the ad because the... →
How did this make it to the top of reddit? →
This is bleak and a pathetic attempt at [not even sure what word should go here]. Must every actress be poked and prodded with knives and adhere to the rules of botulism? So she isn’t going to make it on Maxim’s Hot 100 list. Blabbedy bloo.
I did it.
Against even my own advice, I sent in one final follow-up email. I truly threw a Hail Mary on this one. If I’m on the fence, I’d rather be persistent and annoying than sit idle in the corner.
BMW X5 Hybrid Concept Car →
Here’s the crazy thing, yesterday I said the following sentence: I won’t buy a hybrid (assuming I move back to LA at some point in my life) until they make an X5 or something.
Dissatisfied with the Bachelor’s of Arts degree in... →
Mariel: I just booked it. ROAD TRIP.
Me : So exciting.
Mariel : We are so green.
Me: Sprig would be proud.
Mariel: I didn't get an i pod thing.
Me: I'll sing to you.
Mariel: You could write an article about a green trip to the Hamptons.
Me: What else is green besides the car? Def not us.
Yet another Editorial Director I have interviewed with has left. Maybe I should be meeting with the Editorial Assistants, that way by the time named magazine has finished playing darts (I’m convinced this is the manner in which they select the candidate to hire), that EA will be junior level. There is no point in meeting with Senior Editors because they all leave. Argh.
Waiting
To remain temporarily neglected, unattended to, or postponed. Yup. Tis I. I am most definitely WAITING. I’m thinking of buying a voodoo doll and laying it across my keyboard. I shall sing a song, and envision the doll inviting me to a “we’d like to bring you in for the final round” dance.
It's really airing.... →
I’m boycotting the show. I refuse to watch a single episode.
Whole Foods is a Madhouse...and why it's like the...
It doesn’t matter what time of day you go to a Whole Foods in Manhattan, you can be sure to be bumped and prodded with more dwarf-sized carts and organic shopping bags than ever imagined. Why Whole Foods is like the Airport I found myself inside Whole Foods Chelsea today. Much like the way airports make me feel lightheaded and woozy, I tend to loose a sense of certainty and become fickle...
Read me the number off that business card will ya?
Rebecca: Give me the number on the card.
Ben: 212. 620. 6164
Rebecca: Went straight to the machine, I saw you wrote another number on the card, is that their cell?
Ben: There is no other number.
Rebecca: Yeah right there in the blue ink.
Ben: Oh that. That's the phone number of the guy I assassinated on Grand Theft Auto IV. I used my sniper rifle, zoomed in, read the number off his cell phone, called him, and then I killed him.
Rebecca: [Pauses] Okay....so it's just that one number then.
I bought really cute Gladiator’s yesterday (that I’m partially confident won’t hurt my feet), but I still can’t stop obsessing over my employment situation. It keeps me from sleeping — this morning I woke up at 6 a.m. Today is Sunday.
Freelancing = Out of the Loop
So from what I have gathered, freelancing (see: working from home) puts many things into hiatus: the excitement of lunch (oh wait, I always had lunch at my desk), the anticipation of Thursdays, the appreciation of Fridays, and most importantly, the relationship with calendars. You see, up until a few hours ago, I thought Memorial Day was NEXT Monday. I couldn’t figure out why people were...
I got nothing.
American Airlines charging for any checked bags! →
but I finally earned enough for a free ticket!
T-Mobile'd
Representative: Thank you for calling T-Mobile, how can I help you?
Me: Hi, the last day of my contract is in June, I'd like to cancel it after that because I don't use the second line.
Representative: Oh no, that's terrible. Is something wrong with the phone?
Me: No, I just don't use the second phone and haven't for about six months.
Representative: OK. Well it looks here as though you are eligible for a free phone, would you like to get a free phone?
Me: No, I already have a phone.
Representative: OK well also, you can switch to a different plan if that's not working for you; we have some great specials right now.
Me: Aren't you looking at my information? I have two lines with you. I don't need two, I only want one.
Representative: OK well you have three months if you change your mind, so don't worry about deciding right now.
Me: I've already decided, but fine sure I'll think about it. Can you just cancel the second line please?
My Poor Closet
My pseudo-closet is taking a turn for the worse. What once were two erect and proud garment racks in the corner of the room are now tepid and sagging rods of metal being held up by God knows what.
Clean Hit
I’m not exaggerating when I say this…I took a woman out today. (See: knocked her as* down.) Today is gross and rainy so m.p.h tends to go up. The normal brisk walk of a 25-30 year-old goes from a 3.3 to 3.8 on a day like today. The thing about walking is that you try and tag team with people who are at your pace. Tourists (who are notorious for staying below 2.5 m.p.h) tend to hug...
Well the good news is that
no decisions have been made, the bad news is that no decisions have been made.
Eeeks
I sent out another one….
I am a pill
I just sent a follow-up to my ignored follow-up email. I figure if they want me, being annoying isn’t going to necessarily deter them, it’s just going to make them think I am annoying (and I can live with that). But I refuse to be ignored!
Thanks Revolving Door
There are a few sites I use often to find out about movement in the media world, Revolving Door being one them. Lately it has become incredibly depressing. As it outlines the shuffling of editors from one pub to the next, all it really means to me is that the editor I have interviewed and worked my tail off to impress is no longer there. He/she has moved to [enter third world country here] to...
Such a jet-setter
(don’t worry, I made myself vomit when I wrote that). I’m actually the complete opposite. I flew into LA yesterday via economy class (jet-setters (JS) ride business at least), got picked up at LAX by my mommy (JS’s use car services), went to their house to do a bit of work (JS’s have their own second homes), went shopping with my mom (nothing to say there), went on a run...
Grand Theft Auto IV Helpline
If you or someone you know suffers from the following please let me know: Do you find yourself weaving in an out of traffic - or worse - doing so while on foot? When you order Starbucks in the morning, do you tell them your name is Nico Bellic? Have you started speaking in a strange Russian accent? Do you get excited when you see flashing red lights? If you answered yes to the above questions...
Things that make you go hmmm...
1. Will it ever be possible to drink water, take showers, wear sunscreen - essentially breathe air - without being concerned about their harmful toxins? 2. Is it humanly possible to walk through Times Square (while carrying items in the middle of the day) without getting pissed off beyond belief?
So let me get this straight
Coastal Flood Statement Wind Advisory [State warnings for NY] Rain / Wind 51°F I guess the seasons here go Winter; Cold as Hell; Spring; Just Kidding (which is what we are experiencing right now); Second Attempt at Spring; Three Nice Days; Humid and Gross
Fonstruct.com
enables you to create your own fonts. I spent 15 minutes working on my letter A, and then I lost interest.