December 2008
91 posts
Back in LA, there’s not much to report, except that Emma has eaten all of my socks.
November 2008
56 posts
Dad: So remember I told you my friend’s daughter is an editor at [redacted] magazine. I ran into him today and told him about you.
Me: Oh, that’s sweet of you.
Dad: Yeah apparently they are looking for eds, so you should call her when you come home.
Me: Oh people don’t like receiving those sort of phone calls, do you have her email? Or his email? Or her name?
Dad: I only know...
Net-a-Porter Sale
I hardly ever report on sales, but I want every pair of boots at the Net-a-Porter sale (except for Pucci and Juicy, but doesn’t that go without saying?).
I am now a living breathing member of the Great Magazine Die-Off.
Editor For Hire. Inquire Within.
When relationships fail, buy bakeware.
Friend: I bought a non-stick roaster, gravy boat, ultra flex silicone non-stick fluted tube pan—
Me: What the hell is that?
Friend: …and a pyrex 10 piece bakeware set.
Me: OMG your nuts.
Friend: I’m taking out my life frustrations in the kitchen. I talked to [redacted] last night. It was really sad and he wasn’t talkative.
Me: I’m sorry—
Friend: So I...
How to Spot a Tourist in New York City →
Is it me, or is this the most pathetic attempt at an overdone joke imaginable?
My Night with a Party Crasher
I think am pretty sure I spent the night obliviously chatting with a bonafide party crasher. She was way too normal and friendly to be alone plus the absence of fox around her neck screamed I-wasn’t-invited. (I too didn’t have any fur on, but I was working and wanted to get in and out as fast as possible, so no animals were required.) Here’s a list of the usual suspects at a...
“What will the Joe the Coffee Drinkers of America do when their corner Starbucks shuts down? Walk an extra block to the next one? Please, this ain’t Russia! … I have already gone the extra mile by halting my routine theft of Splenda packets. And in an effort to save the company money on narrow wooden sticks, I now stir coffee with my finger. (You develop a resistance after about...
“The sky is completely black and orange.”
– My quick-to-exaggerate mother, looking at the sky in Santa Monica. This time, I believe her.
“I got the sniper rifle.”
– Roman. In my house. With a controller. And a machine gun.
I have changed my tumblr theme four times today. And three yesterday.
Can you imagine how much trouble I have getting dressed in the morning? (Actually none, I take a lot of pride in getting out the door in 20 minutes or less.)
Headed to the gym, then I’m off to the UK designer party at Tribeca Grand.
City of Angels
Dear Los Angeles (specifically Santa Monica),
I hear that it was 80-degrees today. Today in New York, I wore my London Fog rain coat and decided between my black flannel-trimmed boots or my, um, light black flannel-trimmed boots. But yeah, I heard it was warm by you today. You probably didn’t have to wear boots. Or a coat. Or an umbrella.
As you know, I’ll be there in two weeks. Less...
Cosmetic surgery addict injected cooking oil into... →
Holy crap.
Minding our own biznass
[Walking home from my volleyball game, two drunk blondes nearly stumble into us.]
2DBs: Did ja see it?
Ben: Uh, what?
2DBs: I seen some rats 'round here the size of squirrels.
Ben: Uhhhhhh.
2DBs: But then I saw, and I got all confused in my brain 'cuz I seen a real squirrel.
Ben: Uhhhhhh, am I on a TV show?
I can code!
Me: Don't you think I could write an iphone app myself? I mean I know HTML pretty well.
Ben: You have to be joking.
Me: What?
Ben: That's like me saying I want to be an editor because I can write a haiku.
How to cope with O.P.W.L. in the home?
OPWL stands for Other People’s Wet Laundry and it happens when you live in a building with, oh I don’t know, 104 units and only four washing machines.
In order to do my laundry tonight i had to unload both the soggy wet clothes from the washer (just my luck it was filled with creepy men’s boxers) and the steaming sheets from the dryer. And by the way, we only have three dryers,...
'Tis the Flying Season
Does anyone else have a really difficult time keeping tracking of pending airline travel? I’m not the typical avion-oisseur. On any given day I change my seats, coerce a (nice) travel agent to place me on standby over the phone, sneak onto the plane before my row has been called (I know, I’m so ashamed), steal the pillows of “better flyers” and book extra hotels, cars and...
Last post-election comment...I promise →
This is why I love New York. St. Mark’s place, 14 blocks down from my house. Nuts.
My goal is to...
…attend the Presidential Inaugural Ball on January 19th.
“Nobody lives in the Financial District, who are all these people?”
– A 3.5 hour gothamist.com line-waiter reported.
